Does This Make Me Look Fat?

One of the most common questions I get and don't always know how to answer is the "does this make me look fat" query. It's usually asked by a tall, thin woman with "enhanced features", so to speak. I never understood why any woman as small as a 2 would even have the word "fat" in their lexicon but wonders never cease to amaze, I suppose.

I hate answering this question (positively or negatively) for the following reasons:

• Fishing for a compliment is annoying.


• Validating image because of body dysmorphic disorder is also annoying.


• Pulling an Alpha-female move. "See how much thinner I am than you?"


• Reinforcing what their jerk of a husband criticizes all the time.


• I want to sell what you are wearing but don't want to lie or brown-nose to close the deal.

I may take a second to figure out which way to go ("does she want my honest opinion or does she want me to make her feel pretty?") but, ultimately, I will (almost) always tell you the truth, as most great salespeople will. If I sell you something that makes your butt look big, your jerk husband will ridicule you and you will just return it anyway. Or you may catch a glimpse of yourself in an unflattering mirror and have a meltdown and you will just return it anyway. Or your child will make an innocent comment about your muffin top and you will just return it anyway. See my thought process? My goal is to sell you something you look great in so it won't come back.

I did have a customer, years ago, try a dress on that looked so bad on her that I practically begged her not to buy it. I showed her option after option to try on instead of the one she had her heart set on. She was annoyed and a little offended, even though she asked for my honesty, and ultimately bought the unflattering dress over a multitude of prettier alternatives. It was a flesh-colored tiered-ruffle strapless number that was just awful on her complexion and figure. She was wearing it to a wedding. I have always wondered if she loved the dress after all or if she shrieked when she saw herself in the pictures.

I have since learned to ask you first. "What do you think?" If your response is "I love it" and I don't love it, I will say "You look great!" and hope that karma doesn't come back to get me. The actual truth is, I rarely think someone looks awful in something...I think we women are really too self-critical and need to just go with our instincts and if it makes you feel good, go for it! Big butt be damned!

image credit: www.bizarro.com